September 15, 2020
This week's episode of "The Confusion Experiment" podcast delivers the next installment of the audiobook and chapters two and three in which I continue my journey towards my own transformation without even knowing it. Here is where I come to find Kyle Cease and his personal growth work and submit my video application to be chosen for one of four spots for his weekend retreat. In these chapters I come face to face with unconscious expectations and the slow and painful deconstruction of my mind and the beliefs that were not always working on my behalf.
Please feel free to share this with others during this time of tremendous change. We could all use a bit of a reprieve from the intensity of this time by knowing and hearing that we are going through something and something is going through us!
September 7, 2020
I've decided to bring the audiobook version of "The Confusion Experiment" to this podcast and simply give it to you as a gift! Of course, if you appreciate the work I'm doing and would like to become a Patron or make a one-time donation, you can do so here. Thank you so much for your support1 Also, please share this with others. My book is extremely timely to the collapse we are inside of right now hence the catepillar and the butterfly images I used for my cover art. However it's the chrysalis phase that the book captures. In fact, the 100 day experiment was very much like putting a camera in that gooey cocoon and witnessing a transformation that is otherwise unavailable for viewing. Truly powerful.
This first part inclues the foreword by New York Times Best Selling Author, Kyle Cease, my introduction, acknowledgments and chapter one, "Be Careful What you Ask For." Enjoy.
August 24, 2020
This week's show features the audio from a live stream talk I did Sunday for the Alaska Center for Spiritual Living, my spiritual home in Anchorage. Since we are all going through so much Change right now from significant personal changes as well as societal changes in attitudes, beliefs and values, the topic is ripe for discussion.
I offer some insight about what Change is and how we can look at it from a different perspective and when we do we are able to lighten our emotional relationship to what it is we're going through. Even if it's just for a few minutes, it's ok to step back from the pain, hurt, trauma and drama and get some relief. It's also ok to change our minds. In fact, the ability to change our minds about something is a sign of strength and courage. It shows that we are willing to revisit decisions when either we have changed or new information has arrived that changes our relationship to the situation.
Lastly, there are some tips and strategies that you can apply right now to bring about a peace of mind and heart that is much needed right now, the difference between habits and practices and a reminder that you have everything you need to meet this moment in your life and to deal with Change. A great episode to share with others. Enjoy.
August 17, 2020
There's much being said about COVID19 and on this week's episode I talk about what it's teaching me, you and us. How is it teaching us these lessons? By taking away from us the things we took for granted, the habits that have kept us numb and unconscious, the way of life that has run its course as the new design for living makes its case. The importance of flexibility, the value of contrast, the practice of detachment are all part of life's lesson plan for us.
COVID came shouting into our lives and screamed, "WAKE UP!" Wake up to your life! Wake up to your habits that kep you dependent on people, systems and structures outside of you and get familiar with the practices that turn you back to your own self, your own power and your own inner Intelligence.
COVID has forced us to feel the feelings we've spent a lot of money and time avoiding. Why? Because we don't know how to feel, we don't have enough practice simply being with our feelings without judgement. Also, we're afraid to feel these feelings because they've been avoided for so long they pack quite the punch and we're afraid we won't ever get out from underneath the mess of it all. And lastly, we don't know what to do when we meet ourselves in that silence when all of life as we know it has been snatched away without warning.
If we choose, though, to wake up and ask ourselves, "What is this teaching me? Why is this important for me to feel this feeling and understand how and when it came to be lodged in my heart? What is the lesson for me to learn? What am I clinging to that's making me suffer?" In this week's episode, we head into the laboratory of life with a willingness to change the way we look at things knowing that when we do, the things we look at will change. Enjoy.
August 10, 2020
Everything is upside down these days and very much like the storm that took down the 300 year old trees here in New Jersey, our lives have been uprooted. In this week's episode we talk honestly about the changes we are going through and the chaos that this massive change has brought with it. But in order to deal with the uncertainty of these times, we must begin to examine how our minds work so we know whether or not they're working for us or against us. Questioning what your mind presents to you as true is key if you want to reduce stress.
I also talk about the importance of self-compassion and give you an exercise that you can begin to use to bring some love to yourself as you navigate the new way without a map or instructions. And you can't talk about COVID and not talk about uncertainty. What we realize though is that if we spend too much time fearful and worried, we miss the gifts that uncertainty brings to us. Oftentimes, the answers are seedlings in the fertile soil of not knowing but it takes an understanding of what is really going on to see things differently.
Lastly, we touch on mindful endings and how COVID ripped a way of life right out of our hands. We didn't really have the chance to mindfully acknowledge what has ended. It's not too late to do just that which helps us better accept what is.
Remember to be aware of your breath, stay hydrated, exercise, play your favorite music, turn away from the news and get to know the Intelligence within you that's breathing you! This powerful essence is untouched by all the chaos and confusion and resides in a pure state of ease and grace. The more you tune into it, the more it tunes you! Enjoy.
July 27, 2020
Do you suffer from "decision paralysis?" I have and it's painful. It's that horrible feeling of being stuck, unable to move, afraid to make a choice. It's taken some practice but I have learned how to make decisions in a way that makes me feel better about myself and the decision itself. In fact, I've done so much work around this area of my life I've actually experienced a decision making me! In this week's episode, I talk about the many spokes in the modern day wheel of decision making. They include intuition, the heart and a willingness to change your mind. (What? I'm allowed to do that?!!)
We all have intution. As the great philosopher, Dr. Ernest Holmes said, "Intuition is not a product of the intellect...it is a thing in itself. Instinct is intuition acting unconsciously; intuition is instinct elevated ot the point of self-awareness. They are identical." But like any muscle, intuition must be strengthened and it can only be strengthened when we acknowledge it, welcome it and consciously cultivate our relationship with it in our everyday living. How do we do that? We talk to it, we invite it into our problems, we ask it to show us the way when a decision has to be made. We ask it to help us when we can't "figure it out." Then we listen and trust that what follows is that inner intelligence that knows communicating directly to us.
In this historic moment when everything that we've built our life upon is crumbling, falling out from underneath us, it is important that we stop asking the past to inform us of the future. We've never been here before and the mind can only use what it knows which produces a very limited landscape. The heart however, along with our intuition are designed for such a moment as this. When you add the language and way of the heart and intuition to your mind as a process of knowing, you have a balanced and inclusive formula for decision making that produces a personal methodology that helps you move forward with greater confidence.
Come join me in the laboratory of life this week and let's take a deep dive into this wonderful topic!
July 20, 2020
These are uncertain times. But why has uncertainty gotten such a bad reputation? Well, that's because we have placed a high value on knowing. In fact, we have an obsession with knowing and when we don't know the mind tells us that's not a good thing. However, when we examine this more closely, we can clearly see that's not necessarily true. Turns out, uncertainty is a natural and normal experience in life. It's especially normal when we're dealing with a new way.
This week's episode explores uncertainty from two perspectives: the mind and the heart. We also get real with our ignorance to how "the new" really works. For example, a new way arrives without all the facts, figures, information and proven successful formula immediately available. That's the beauty of something being new! It gives us a chance to experience the pureness of something having no past. It gives us the chance to live inside something and allow it to unfold, like a movie, one frame at a time. It's called the journey. The mind wants the destination. It doesn't value the journey; it values the way that gets you there. We need to learn how the new works. By doing so, we can meet this moment, right now, with a greater sense of compassion, flexibility, curiosity and understanding.
Then we can better answer the question, "how do we live in and with uncertainty?" This week's show gets into that, too and offers up some considerations.
- Live in the question. The mind only wants the answer but uncertain times require us to live inside the question, to reframe the question many times over, to contemplate multiple possibilities and to put the question inside our bodies by imagining its many potential answers to see how it feels.
- Educate yourself on why your mind resists uncertainty so you can bring compassion to those moments when you're in resistance to not knowing.
- Be willing to redefine uncertainty as a valuable experience during times of Change.
- Embrace a daily practice like mindful breathing, yoga, meditation, chanting, walking, anything that connects you to your breath and puts you in your body.
- Don't deny or judge moments of uncertainty or force yourself to be certain of something that has not yet ripened.
Please share this episode, rate and review it too as that helps a new podcast grow! Enjoy.
July 13, 2020
Did you know that confusion is intentionally used as a strategy in marketing? It's also used in the work we do as a way to keep our competitors on the defensive, it's used in interpersonal relationships and it's used in politics as a way to keep the masses controlled and in fear. The confusion we experience as a result of a well thought out plan remains as something we personally experience only when it's not challenged. This is where critical thinking comes into play.
In this week's episode, we get real with our own use of confusion as a personal strategy, oftentimes when we are not even conscious of it, and what are the gifts it yields. We also use the laboratory of life to get into some important questions: How, then, does critical thinking help? What are the skills that a critical thinker use? Can we strengthen our ability to apply critical thinking more often in our everyday living?
This week we answer those questions and give ourselves a much needed test to see where we land on the scale of between being an active participant in thinking on our own and a passive recipient of information. (Think social media!) Give it a listen and share it with someone so that the two of you can do a follow-up discussion and further explore this important topic.
Here's the website I used when describing what critical thinking is and the questions you can ask yourself to experience what it's like to critically think your way through something.
July 6, 2020
Confusion often gets a bad reputation for being a negative experience and is seen as a sign that you're lost or worse, don't know what you're doing or where you're going. But The Confusion Experiment reveals to us that chaos and confusion are actually high states of consciousness when you understand what is actually going on during these times of upheaval.
In this episode we explore the messy, sacredness of confusion as a time of tremendous potency and possibility and why we don't want to rush through such a moment as this though the mind can't wait to get out of it! That's because confusion is the antithesis to what keeps the mind calm which is knowing and knowing is not one of the qualities of confusion. That doesn't make it less valuable it just makes it different. Once we align ourselves with what is really going on during times of confusion and chaos, we can slow down a bit and look around so as to gather up the fertile seeds that are scattered about.
We also talk about the pushback that we experience outside and inside of ourselves when we're in times of Change, why that's so and what we can do with all these "little deaths" we're experiencing. The take away from this week's time in the laboratory of life is to:
1. Meet your confusion with compassion. It's your mind that's having a hard time.
2. Redefine your own confusion and see it as a high state of consciousness and of tremendous value.
3. Remind yourself that chaos and confusion hold the seeds of the new. You just have to look for them.
4. Lean into those activities or practices that keep you centered and feeling light.
5. Remember to practice flexibility.
Enjoy this week's show!
June 30, 2020
Five weeks in to the new show and I sit down with Kokayi Nosakhere who is dedicated to educating us on inter-generational racial trauma that resides in our nervous system. What's fascinating about this theory is that it exists in both the victim and the perpetrator and the steps necessary for this healing to take place. It's a truly engaging and interesting conversation that leaves us all with three steps that we can take right now to begin to not just dismantle the inequality inherent in our society but to rebuild from an agreed upon value: community.